Where is home?
Our latest instalment welcomes Welsh producer Wilf and Bulgarian photographer and dancer Vladimir Gruev (a.k.a Filmadelyx) exploring the difficult questions of what and where is home. It’s a paradoxical thing, in a world so connected you can lose yourself so many times in a row. See what they have to say about it.
wilf: At the moment I am in and out of work, just trying to find a job that can keep me fulfilled and peaceful whilst allowing me to carry on pursuing music in my spare time. I didn’t go to University so instead just moved to a city near to my home town to get a taste of a different scene and challenge myself a bit more. Right now music plays a big part in my life, it’s really the only constant grounding thing that I have and it really keeps me connected and sane in this crazy world! I’m soon off to India for 3 months of travelling though, which will give me a nice break from music and allow me to focus on myself and other things in life that keep me happy and creative.
filmadelyx: I was given the name Vladimir and have been here for 25 rotations around the sun. Still figuring out why though. I like shooting on film and rolling around on the floor (professionally). Basically, I’m Doctor Jekyl and Mr. Hyde – trying to combine my passion for movement as a dancer and my visual hunger as a photographer and videographer (occasionally).
However, currently, I’m mainly focused on my dance career by working in the French company Herve Koubi, spending most of my time touring. At the moment I use photography mainly as a hobby, a tool to keep myself human and simple documentation of my life.
In conclusion, I feel awkward like a Wes Anderson movie character.
Filmadelyx:
‘Where do you live’ has been the most confusing question for me this past year. And yes, it’s a blessing, a dream came true, but too good is maybe not always good.
Early alarm. Packing. Underwear, socks, toothbrush, a roll of film or two.
A goodbye kiss.
Where are you going? When are you coming back ?
Train stations. Moving landscapes. Coffee.
Passport – check. Boarding pass – check.
Where are you going? When are you coming back ?
Countless hotel rooms or just crashing on a friend’s coach.
Living out of a suitcase.
Taking snaps to convince yourself it’s not another deja vu but it actually happened.
But where do you come from?
Rewind.
Departing but never arriving.
Can you define inspiration? Do you think an artist can push beyond the boundaries of inspiration and create without the need of inspiration?
Wilf: for me, as I believe inspiration completely changes from person to person, I see it as simply as something that gives you an extra energy to make or pursue something that you already know you want. I find myself mainly inspired by the work of the people I love, be it other artists or friends and family around me. It’s definitely possible though in my opinion to be creative without direct inspiration, sometimes you can just wake up and the first thing you want to do is go and make something and do something no one’s done before, without having to look around for something to push you to do it.
Filmadelyx: Inspiration is when you wait for the bus and the track in your headphones makes you unable to stop your feet from moving even though you look mad in the eyes of the fellow passengers as they can’t hear the music. Inspiration is when the sun is going down and it creates interesting surreal shadows and unintentionally your hand reaches for your phone/camera in the pocket.
In short, I guess it’s a small event that changes the environment around you or offers a new point of view on it. it triggers an instinct to go out of your way and create something.
However, I guess quite often after you have been doing the same thing for years as a profession at one point the inspiration simply runs out. For instance, I can definitely feel when this ingredient is missing in a favourite artist’s work. They had to make a new record, or he had to make a new movie, a new book had to be released, etc. When it’s marketing but not love driving the process, the end product is simply easily forgettable.
To sum up, you can, but you probably shouldn’t, if your will is not coming from a pure place.
How much do you think your environment has shaped you as an artist?
Wilf: I grew up in a village in Wales and lived there for 19 years, and to me it’s the place I will always call home and that gives me the most peace and serenity out of anywhere I can be. I think that comfortability and freedom definitely allowed me to express myself as much as possible when creating – I often find the times I can’t make music are when I am in a place and situation which isn’t relaxing for me. On top of that my parents played the music I still love to this day from when I was tiny – load of hip hop, jazz, soul – and my family are all musical, so that definitely shaped my ear and my love for music from a young age.
Filmadelyx: Hugely. I even think I have 2 versions of my self – the one that grew up in a decaying Eastern European country and a westernised one.
Growing up in one of the most depopulated towns (Vidin) in a country with a bad economic state and almost zero interest into the arts sector created a never leaving melancholy and suffocation inside of me. But I think it also taught me to be kind to other people because the world already looked so fucked up out there, why make it even worse. That’s why the work I do rarely focuses on the negative issues but tries to add something nice out there.
Aesthetically, living in a country full of old collapsing buildings and soviet blocks, I was forced to find some kind of beauty in it. Romanticising about the past is probably the easiest thing one can do in a city like Sofia for example, full of history but holding an unclear future.
Later in my life, when I moved to Western Europe, this feeling of suffocation disappeared – everything seemed easier to achieve than ever. Also I realised what I was doing had much bigger value and felt more appreciated. For the last 2 years I’ve been basically living in a suitcase and I feel like it’s just the beginning. It could be exhausting to lack the comfort and security of home but also it’s quite exciting to not settle down and keep collecting memories and ideas that later you can explore more deeply.
What do you think that an art form has to possess in order for it to be memorable and make people come back to it?
Wilf: A feeling. I think it’s as simple as that. That’s why art is so beautiful because it births a completely individual reaction to everyone who sees or hears it. It could be a feeling from the artist themselves too, if you can connect with who they are and the emotions they are conveying then you’ll wanna go back and understand that even more.
Filmadelyx: Recently, I found an interview between River Phoenix and Flea, the bassist of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and one of Flea’s lines stuck in my mind:
‘You can never play a single note that it’s good if you don’t have lots of love in your heart for things that are pure and beautiful.’
And I think this is correct for any other artform. This kind of love for your craft, for the world, is most essential.
Then of course things like honesty, hard work and research would make the picture complete.
And the last thing would be teaming up – bringing lots of other people like you, madly in love with what they do to work on the same idea. This creates a beautiful environment where everyone stimulates each other. The final result will be remarkable.
